Respond Pick up lines

So the obvious answer is yes, I do. But here's the back story: Back in August, I slid into this girl's DMs. We exchanged a couple playful messages and that was that. I hit her back up again in September just to keep things warm. Then in October I asked, "are you almost ready?" She said, "for what?" I said, "our coffee date." She replied, "I might be ready by December lmao." She could've said that because maybe she had shit going on at the time or if she wasn't interested maybe think I'd forget about her by then. Well, I almost did lol and then I remembered today so I hit her up and said, "Since I'm nice I gave you a little extra time. You ready now?" However, she replied with "wanna have a threemsome with my future gf?" Keep in mind, we hadn't talked since October and it was about a coffee date, we don't follow each other and this was her reply. Now 9 times outta 10 if a girl asked this I'd suspect it to be some simp test or her being bored and just fucking with me with no intention of actually...fucking with me. But right when she sent this message she also looked at my profile and liked a recent (shirtless) photo of me which I don't think a girl with zero interest would do. But at the same time even girls with interest don't straight up ask if you wanna have sex, let alone a threemsome with a "future" gf? Futures gf? Which that's a whole other mindfuck. So I guess the question is, how do I respond with being open to it if it's the 1 out of 10 times she's serious about it, but also not come across as a needy simp to the effect of "omg I would love to!"

She said “wow impressive” and I don’t know how to respond.

Cause I'm trying to inspect your axe wound, girl

I’m used to being on the other end of this so I have no idea how to respond to this pls help

More than likely will respond. Then say “That’s okay. I forget my dreams too sometimes

This girl from Bulgaria obviously just shit-tested me. Our conversation has been getting stale so I gave it a fresh boost; I asked her the following question and this was her response. This is obviously a shit-test. How should I properly respond to this? **Me**: Have you been on a date recently? **Bulgarian Chick**: I don't have time for a date. Also the boys in my country are really disgusting. I can't just say, "all mens are, deep down" Please help

I'm a man and looking for a long term relationship and it is kind of brain storm to comeup up with a new customized one for every single profile. Besides, we can't expect everyone to respond or even look at it. What are someof your best pickup lines for girls on a dating app ?

...respond with “i can be a pain in your ass”

She/he responds ‘What?’ ‘Look so good.’

could use this pick-up line for a woman who hasn't responded in a few days

Because my dick is not responding.

Because (name).exe has stopped responding

Not really a line but I felt like this belonged here. So I have a scar on my left hand, its a little dent that I got when I fell on a belt buckle and got the thing that goes through the loops stuck in it. The other night I was walking around with this girl I like and I was telling her the story and put out my hand to show her and so she could feel it. She feels around and says something about how it must've hurt and I respond with something along the lines of. "Yeah it was awful," and then I wrapped my hand around hers and started walking. I still can't believe it actually worked.

From OkCupid, on a girl's profile question that asks "What makes me feel at home?", A girl answered "My fridge". I sent a message about that question/answer saying "but isn't it empty all the time?", To which she responded "You haven't seen my fridge". What to respond?

This happened to me a few weeks ago and I'm pretty proud of this line I made up. I was walking around in a department store with this girl, and a worker came up to us and asked "Do you guys need any help?" I responded with the usual "No thanks" and then quickly added "I already found everything I'm looking for" My friend gasped a little, and as I walked away, I heard the worker say "Damn that was good."

I drink. It’s enjoyable. I think that I am a pretty good drunk too. I don't get overly emotional; I don't get angered easy; the only stupid things I do when loaded hurt me and no one else; and I don't, typically, cause shit. But, every once in a while, I will be out on the town and that little glint will surely be showing in the corner of my eye. I am stretching to remember this story as it happened in a pub that has been since renamed twice. One particular, Friday/Saturday night it was myself, a few buddies and one of my brothers. It was the brother I lived with in the area at the time and we had a treasure trove of inside jokes at all times; I could tell that outsiders found it nearly detestable being around us because they would have no fucking clue what we were talking about. A particular hilarious inside joke we had at this time came out while watching sports, particularly hockey. Our mom's side of the family was a farming family and my mom was, generally, a modern woman with all that behind her; unless you threw her in an exciting situation, then the farmer side would shine forth. This was particularly illuminated whenever she would get excited about sports and she would let out a, what sounded like from a coyote, 'yip' noise. We grew up with that noise popping out above all else at numerous soccer and football games our whole lives. For some reason, either my brother or I did it while watching the Oilers play, and presumably lose, we thought that it was the singlehanded funniest thing in the whole world. All the best comedy is just pointing out the absurdity of commonplace things; our mom's yip was to be no different. So anyways, we are at the Thirsty Turtle one particular night. I have a great crew of guys and it was a pretty great place for talking to girls; really casual and everyone got fucked up there all the time. Through some fucking miracle, I find myself sharing a small table with a young lady and I am doing my best to show her that I am not a rapist; it really is the first thing you need to establish when you are hitting on a girl at a bar; you can’t just say “hey, I’m not a rapist”, you need to use subtlety in order to convince them of your legitimacy. But my brother would walk by and every time he did he would emit that same high-pitched "yip!" I, obviously, would need to respond with the same, it wouldn't be as infinitely funny to us if I didn't. After the first yip, the girl leaned in close to me and said "what the fuck was that? Did you just bark at me?" I laughed at the absurdity of the question and in the midst of my outburst she leaned in again to say "cause I don't fuckin play that." My first thoughts were: "This isn't the first time someone has barked at you?" and "if so, what the fuck are you all about to have this be a common occurrence?" I really did think it was hilarious how serious our conversation got, but wanted to get laid; so, I picked up the slack, changed the subject, and tried to get friendly again. Things were going pretty well until my brother made another lap around the bar. "Yip", he insisted as he walked by. "YIP!" I said with zeal to respond. Needless to say, my date was very unimpressed with my hooting. She leaned in to say something presumptuous, along the lines of: "are you fucking assholes calling me a dog?" I laughed at the craziness of the situation and she got mad and was nearly yelling "Don't fucking bark at me". That glint I was talking about then surged up as if from nowhere and implanted itself on my eye. I leaned right up to her as if to whisper an apology in her ear and said "yip". She didn't say a word as she lifted her leg up, placed her foot on my stool, and pushed off. As I fell backwards I reached for anything I could grab, but there were no handles available; I can still see the lateral rotation of the room and feel my chance to get laid falling to the floor with me. I fell backwards to a luckily unattended area and the only thing that hurt was my pride. The bouncer then came up to me and said "you gotta go". I responded like a little wiener with "but she pushed ME!" He said, "I know, I saw the whole thing, she is getting kicked out the back door". I love how they kicked me out the front and her out the back as if we were to fight. Is that an Edmonton assumption? I left with my tail between my legs and went home to the doghouse again.

The characters: Downstairs neighbor - single man in his mid 30s Upstairs neighbor - 25 year old female living with her SO The scene: Upstairs neighbor's SO was out of town for 2 weeks, and Upstairs neighbor had gotten her car stuck in the icy driveway. Texted Downstairs neighbor to ask where rocksalt may be in the garage (one of only 4 texts that had occurred between these two parties during the full year of them being neighbors). Downstairs neighbor responds with the location of the rocksalt. The next morning - 6am Downstairs neighbor begins texting conversation with Upstairs neighbor. Somehow resulted in these lines "Wanna come down stairs? I have Netflix" After a cordial refusal and a few more sporadic texts, he goes for the clincher "I have often thought about being intimate with you"