Fixed Pick up lines

The best Fixed pick up lines

Do you need your car fixed?

Because I'm a pick up master
📅︎ Aug 19
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Hey girl, are you the presidency of Herbert Hoover?

Cause you suck. And you *ruined* me. You wiped out my life's savings over petty credit purchases. You broke me down mentally to a point where I was done with life and isolating myself. You're such a cruel, heartless bitch that you convinced my boss to "lay me off". And then, here's the worst part you self centred bastard, you "tried to fix things". Bullshit. Nothing that broken could have been fixed by your ineffective means... You can't just give me a small gift and expect everything to heal. I can't pay for a more than 60% increase in my spendings because of you! And now my depression that your awfulness directly caused is affecting my friends too. Act like the way you speak and fix your character, you do nothing wreck. Oh and give me my gold bullion back, you lying whore. I don't have any other money for food and you aren't helping me out here.
👤︎ u/celloninja7
📅︎ Apr 08
🚨︎ report

You wanna do a COVID-19 with me?

I'll watch you do a spreadie, screw with a million people, catch me, take my breath away then finally leave me with a massive debt and a depression that can't be fixed, leading me to a life of heavy drinking, self isolation and an eventual heroin overdose in a ditch with my mangled, dirty body never to be found without a soul on earth caring.
📅︎ Apr 03
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Are you the current state of Reddit's comment system?

Because you're kinda broken and I want you to be fixed.
📅︎ Oct 28
🚨︎ report

Hey girl can I kill you?

Because then half of global warming will get fixed
📅︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report