Minutes Pick up lines

The best Minutes pick up lines

Dante finished a large pizza in under five minutes

Let's see if i can finish you in four
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/VergilArcanis
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 16
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So bartender will you give this lady a whiskey and a napkin after 10 minutes please.

I already have a pen for writing down my number.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/manandarchild
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 17
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If this was the last 45 minutes of our lives, we'd probably do something crazy like go have sex now huh?

Now considering that there's a tiny nonzero probability that this is the last 45 minutes of our lives, can we go have sex for a tiny nonzero amount of time?
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/OneQuadrillionOwls
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 01
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It's believed that people see the best things in life 5 minutes before they pass away

Should I die to meet you?
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Aurosonic
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 21
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My watch is telling me you donโ€™t have panties on

Maybe itโ€™s 5 minutes fast...
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Everestpapi
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 19
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Roses are red but I'm not sure

Without you 60 minutes feel like an hour
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/DumbA5h
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 19
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Hey, are you a toaster?

Because I want to give you this bread for about two minutes of your time
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ELAmentsICE
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 17
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Im like a microwave meal

Because the pictures look better then the real thing and im finnished in 2 minutes.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/maddestgains
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 06
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He : My watch say you are not virgin ?

She : what ? I am a virgin !! He : My watch is 20 minutes fast
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/arutprakash
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 13
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Hey girl, were you standing near an oven in the last minutes?

Cause it's that, or you're just hot ;) (Inspiration from u/akaloosha's post)
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/SvG112003
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 05
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Girl are you my homework?

Because I want to slam you on the desk, promise to do you all night long, get distracted, last 2 minutes, cry, turn on the tv and continue to hate myself for another weak performance
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Chrisvidal
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 20
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Hey girl are you a workout...

Because I wanna claim I did you for 10 minutes.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Halfbakedcoin18
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 09
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Hey girl, are you a Netflix series?

Because I'd stay up 5 minutes past my bedtime to finish you
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Im_Here_For_TheMemes
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 31
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are you the pizza i just ordered?

because iโ€™m trying to eat you in thirty minutes or less.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/simpgod420
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 30
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My magic watch says that you donโ€™t have on any underwear.

(She says yes I do) Damn! it must be 15 minutes fast
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/justapenguin9724
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 30
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Hey girl are you my homework?

Cause I wanna slam you on the desk talk about doing you for hours only to last seven minutes and cry myself to sleep
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Redditisbootiful
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 28
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Will you be my alarm clock?

So i can spank you every 10 minutes, for another 10 minutes.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Funkyember
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 04
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Like Little Caesar's...

Like little Caesar's....I'll be Hot N Ready within 5 minutes
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Vampz_Love
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 12
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I have a special watch thatโ€™s telling me youโ€™re not wearing any underwear right now...

Oh you are? It must be 15 minutes fast!
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Bugbee22
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 08
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Dang girl, are you my ballsack hair

Because I want to sit on the toilet for 30 minutes, and stare at you
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/joeyburnham
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 04
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You must be my homework

Cause I wanna slam you on my desk, forget about you, do you hard for 2 minutes, give up, and then cry about my performance
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/NickGarcia19
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 30
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Hey girl, are you Geico?

Because in the last 15 minutes you've made me grow 15%
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/bgrraeyednon
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 11
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Are you The Elephant's Foot?

Because I wouldn't last 5 minutes with you.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/jUkkLeb
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 08
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My watch can detect intimate details about girls. Right now itโ€™s telling me youโ€™re not wearing panties.

You are? I think itโ€™s just running about 30 minutes fast.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/YinYangMojo
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 13
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What would you like on your half of the pizza?

... (30 minutes into chatting with her a pizza actually shows up)
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/HHamdanOTT
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 13
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You see a girl and her friends sitting in the metro and you approach them

Hi, (looking at the girl and then looking over at her friends) you have the rest of your lives to get to know her, but for me, i just got these few minutes, so can i have her?
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/thebushasarrived
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 22
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This one is a little more elaborate

You go up to the girl and tell her: 'Hey, I've got this magic clock, it tells me if people are wearing underwear. Right now it tells me that you are not wearing any underwear' she: 'But I am' you:'Damn the clock's five minutes ahead of time'
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/denstreef
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 27
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Right so I have no clue how to talk to girls

Just to give you a clarification on how shit I am at talking to girls at prom once this girl I was friends with wore this long and wide red dress that fell behind her and I said to her โ€œyou look lovely, you look like a very beautiful jabbaโ€ she didnโ€™t know what that was and as if that wasnโ€™t a godsend enough that she didnโ€™t know and that a higher power wasnโ€™t telling me to just end on your beautiful I then proceeded to say โ€œumm you look like a very pretty slugโ€ right so now everythingโ€™s cleared up thatโ€™s not even the worst thing Iโ€™ve ever said to a girl the only reason I actually have any girls who are friends is because once at a party I was drunk and I said I was gay, Iโ€™m not but the next day at college all the girls were putting me cause all the roadmen were Fucking getting a right laugh out of it then they all got suspended then all the girls started talking to me so I just went along with it Right so now that rabbit hole is impossible to get out of so Iโ€™m bisexual according to everyone but me, I donโ€™t know how to Fucking be a human being for more than three minutes HELP
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/areallytinyhorse
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 01
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What's the weirdes pick-up line you've ever used that succeeded?

What's the weirdes pick-up line you've ever used that succeeded? I'll go first; ''What's the difference between you and an armadillo? I didn't jerk off to an armadillo five minutes ago.''
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ivy_league33
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 20
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Trigger Warning: Offensive pick-up line ahead

Hey girl, you can call me the North Tower. Cause I put out for 102 minutes then leave you in pieces on the ground.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/jacencross
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 16
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Girl, are you the SAT?

Cuz I'd do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes with a break in the middle for snacks.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/shmogi
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 31
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"Are you wearing underwear?"

"Oh well then my watch (or phone) is fifteen minutes fast."
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/levi_spinny
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 30
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