Our Pick up lines

Cuz you have a Gorge Tush

Can i taste yours for a change?

1. You’re cute. 2. We should totally date. 3. I’m making this all up. I used this with success. Date coming up soon! EDIT: The date went well. We deleted our apps and got each other’s numbers! EDIT 2: She said she isn’t feeling the chemistry but I am really sweet and she wants to be friends.

From WLIIA

*Irrational and never ending*

If they say no because they don't get it they ain't worth your time lol

Cause I want to destroy Uranus.

Roses are red So is the state Let us be comrades Because you are great

Now considering that there's a tiny nonzero probability that this is the last 45 minutes of our lives, can we go have sex for a tiny nonzero amount of time?

Him: "Come here often?" Me: "No, would you like to?" Him: "I'll have you know in spoken for" Me: "Is that so? Then allow me to make you speechless" He ended up telling the rest of our group, he was so impressed lol

So the obvious answer is yes, I do. But here's the back story: Back in August, I slid into this girl's DMs. We exchanged a couple playful messages and that was that. I hit her back up again in September just to keep things warm. Then in October I asked, "are you almost ready?" She said, "for what?" I said, "our coffee date." She replied, "I might be ready by December lmao." She could've said that because maybe she had shit going on at the time or if she wasn't interested maybe think I'd forget about her by then. Well, I almost did lol and then I remembered today so I hit her up and said, "Since I'm nice I gave you a little extra time. You ready now?" However, she replied with "wanna have a threemsome with my future gf?" Keep in mind, we hadn't talked since October and it was about a coffee date, we don't follow each other and this was her reply. Now 9 times outta 10 if a girl asked this I'd suspect it to be some simp test or her being bored and just fucking with me with no intention of actually...fucking with me. But right when she sent this message she also looked at my profile and liked a recent (shirtless) photo of me which I don't think a girl with zero interest would do. But at the same time even girls with interest don't straight up ask if you wanna have sex, let alone a threemsome with a "future" gf? Futures gf? Which that's a whole other mindfuck. So I guess the question is, how do I respond with being open to it if it's the 1 out of 10 times she's serious about it, but also not come across as a needy simp to the effect of "omg I would love to!"

Beacause if this hypothesis is correct you're the best thing my fucking mind ever created

cuz maybe u can help me with this equation: add the bed, subtract our clothes, divide our legs and multiply more of us

wanna fight?

So I can erase your past and write our future

Just enter your name, number and when you want to go on our first date.

Cause I want to erase your past and write our future.

But together we would make a great pear.

We both wanna bury our bone in your backyard

Other person: yea, so? How about i taste yours for a change?

On our first date: 1. I will eat you. 2. You will eat me. 3. We unmatch.

But ours will definitely be my favorite 😉

Let me taste yours for a change 😏

Wanna spend their money on a nice movie? - Day 6

Girl, it’s right there in the spelling; I don’t see an n/end in “our love.”

Can we get yours Girl: NO! Me: GET IN THE FUCKING TRUNK BITCH!

Let’s build a house, and put our beds together

I’ll give you an A because your awesome a B because your beautiful a C because your confident and later I’ll give you this D because you deserve it

Cause our relationship’s gonna be short, passionate, and at the end the courts will get involved

2 am stuff

Crush: Thanks , but I’m not a mother ? Me: Not yet but you will make a great mother to our children.

You can hold my banana while I dunk it in cider

"We're going to fucking die in the meanwhile wanna date?"

So anyways, I was thinking you and I should lose our virginity to each other, what do you think?

•Do u have a pencil? Because i wanna erase your past and write our future •Are you made of nickel cerium arsenic and sulfur? Cus u got a NiCE AsS •Are you terms and conditions ? Because whatever you say i ll always agree with you

That's probably why you're so a-peeling

Me either. But since I got your attention do you have a moment to talk about our Lord n savior

I like peanut butter spread, peanut butter and jelly spread, egg and mayo spread, and I also love your legs spread.

Well there’s gonna be 7 when I destroy ur anus

Good thing I’ll be wearing the pants in our relationship.

With a begining, but no end bae ;)

There is a certain amount of respect I would love to obtain from you. But this aspect of understanding and knowledge of each other, I would love to get to know you better in all ways in order to respect you more fully, ways i can obtain this respect comes with the knowledge of knowing you better physically, mentally, spiritually and in all other aspects. Knowledge of each other physically can be accomplished in several ways, perhaps a tactic of understanding can be done in photography of our physical bodies. Perhaps we could exchange detailed photographs of us physically in order to understand each other better in turn to set the stage for an even deeper, solid, and respectful relationship

Well I think we only use 10% of our hearts too

After all that’s what we are gonna name our son and daughter

If that’s true, then you’re the best thing I’ve come up with.

Because I want both our towers to blow up

Our wedding photos

...cuz then U and I could be together.

We have met in our dreams

Said this to my girlfriend on Saturday night, she said "Well you could in our sieve, because it's crap." In fairness, we do need a new sieve.

Cause I got your name but I forgot our date Wish me luck kings, I just used that one on a girl who added me on snap

Because I'd love showing off to the entire world that you're with me. We can go anywhere you want to go. I'll buy dinner and pay for our movie tickets too. Genuinely no expectation for sex because just knowing you want to spend time with me would get me off. We can get ice creams and lick each other's flavors. Like in super slow motion. If you choke on something I'm going to do everything in my power to keep you alive because when we do have sexual intercourse it will only be with your not dead body. Every time I see you my heart does multiple somersaults inside and I wish you could somehow feel that feeling it gives me so you'd have some idea of how fully head over heels I am for you and that luscious body you're packing into that outfit of yours. When we do make sweet love to each other's bodies you will always finish first. In fact if you don't bust a lady nut I won't be busting a jizz nut either. If you send me nudes not only will I never share them with anybody else ever I will also make sure and keep them inside encrypted folders on external drives that I keep in my 6 foot fire proof safe. Any time I use them to pleasure my weiner dong I'll make sure to put the nudes back into the safe immediately. Before I even clean up the mess you made me make because I was thinking about you and you got me so horny I couldn't even properly prepare ahead of time and get the paper towels ready so I just launched the baby batter right into my belly button. And when our date is over I'm going to be waiting by my phone anxiously awaiting your next texts to find out when I can set eyes on you again. What really confuses me is how I survived all my life without you because now that I know you girl, I can't live another moment without you in my life. Ok so, pick you up around 5?

So that we can tie our game of life with the score of love.

I hope we can leave our houses in May!

Cause I can see us stage our honeymoon

Cause i think we should turn my room into OUR room. *play soviet Russia’s anthem for best effect*

Cause in our chemistry, we might be the strongest bond together. :)

Because I’d like to erase your past and write our future.

Cuz I’m looking to see our boy 😎

L ove's ecstacy will ensnare our souls and E very tender moment of time spent T ogether will be punctuated by S oft whispers of want and need. F ruit of our passion U niting us together, our C ares and desires fulfilled with me as your K ing and you as my queen

Gotta make our last moments worthwhile, take off you're clothes and get in the bed 🤪 - Day 41

cuz it's in our atmosphere tonight ;)

By the way our daughters name is gonna be Stacy.

We both can come down your chimney and deliver our holiday loads

Mine was math. You plus me minus our clothes divide your legs and let's multiply.

"How many of these things have you sold?" said me uncle. He used to work in Coal-MINING. We gave him the benefit of the doubt when we called him our uncle, but we think he's really not one of us. Tables are turning, minds are churning, pornography is destroying our uncles, our this, our that. These days it's all about MUSCLE. Cash flowing from the WALLET. Superficial and maniacal, that's why we fantasize. PORNOGRAPHY has contributed to the EPITOMY OF BAD, called the internet. It's been extremely bad for all of the children and me uncle was the first to called it out in the late 90s. Guys, if you're on this path for real, comment "Yes, I'm gonna do this". \-Damien

Because I'd love to put our tulips together

We'll add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply?

Just like our mom and dad did

Me and this chick, our conversation has been boring so I figured I need to say something provocative but not in a too direct way. What makes this girl boring to talk to is that she would always say, "I'm too tired. I need sleep" So yesterday I playfully said "Aren't you asleep yet" And then I said **"Can I sleep next to you?"**. That got a great reaction from her because it created somewhat sexual vibe but not in a rude way. So my question here is, **are there any mild sexual invites that you think it would trigger sexual fantasy** like what I mentioned in bold above? Just thought knowing those as many as possible would be good

I want to turn "my house" into "our house."

Cause I want to erase your past and write our future.