Liter Pick up lines

The best Liter pick up lines

Literally the 2 best pickup lines ever

Ok boys, these are not my own invention, but rather from a Key and Peele sketch. However, I have field tested them in real life, and I do have a 100% success rate with them or variations of them. “Looking at you is like looking at a mountain creek after a spring thaw, simply refreshing!” AND “You ladies are smoldering, just like the sun! And just as bright too, in those dresses!” Change them up a little. For example: “You are smoldering, just like the sun! And just bright too, with that smile.” If you really want to, you can add in a little “What is your secret?” After initial delivery Good luck boys!
📅︎ May 21
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Everything is made in China,

except you. You're made in India. With Love. Literally.
📅︎ Jun 29
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I told stars about you

They literally fell
📅︎ Jun 17
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Hey girl, are you oxygen?

Cuz i would literally die if i were separated from you for long enough...
📅︎ Aug 06
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Your breath must be full of chloroform ;)

Because you’re literally so fucking boring your putting me to sleep
📅︎ Feb 29
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I don’t get why girls are stocking up on toilet paper

When they can literally sit in my face for free🤷‍♂️
👤︎ u/solm42168
📅︎ Mar 17
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Proven Formula for Picking Up Chicks

I have created the perfect formula for helping my guy friends pick up chicks in bars. Men, all you need is one female friend or buddy’s girlfriend (let’s call her Hannah) to help and the hot chick you want to meet needs to be at the bar. Step 1: Hannah goes up to bar next to the hot chick you want to pick up. Step 2: Hannah compliments the hot chick on literally anything (“omg I love your hair color who is your stylist?” “wow that jacket is awesome, where can I find one” etc.). We all love talking to chicks who say nice things about us. Step 3: While Hannah is chatting up hot girl on her right, you are buying three shots on her left. Step 4: You offer a shot to Hannah while she is still chatting up hot chick. Step 5: Hannah (loudly) claims she can’t find her boyfriend who the third shot was purchased for. Since Hannah and hot chick are now BFFs, she turns to hot chick and says the following “My friend Jake here bought my boyfriend and I a shot but we can’t find him anywhere, do you want to take it with us?” Introduce yourself. Offer hot girl the shot. Emphasize that Hannah’s boyfriend disappeared, etc. Step 6: Hot girl ALWAYS says yes because hot girls at bars love free shots. Step 7: Hannah takes a shot. Tells Lexi (all hot girls are named Lexi) it was nice to meet her, and dips out. You are left chatting up Lexi, buy her a drink, drunkenly make out with her in a corner after 2 hours, etc.p Why does this work? 1. When Hannah compliments Lexi (aka hot chick), Lexi automatically likes Hannah and sees that she’s totally normal and super nice. 2. By you being friends with Hannah, it makes you seem like a regular cool guy and you must be great if you have such cool female friends. 3. Because you’re buying shots, you also seem like a pretty cool dude. Everyone loves the guy who buys people shots. 4. And most importantly, because Hannah lies about her boyfriend being in the bathroom or wherever, hot chick knows you two aren’t hooking and that Hannah is not a threat. Hannah wins because she gets a free shot. Lexi wins because she gets a free shot and gets to meet a cool person like yourself. You win because awesome hot chicks like us let you buy us shots. Go forth and conquer, my friends.
📅︎ Oct 19
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is it okay for me to be internet explorer and crash at your place tonight?

this app just shut down my laptop its really sad so if you can surprise me with something funny in the comments I will literally love you a lot
📅︎ Oct 17
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Are you a Kugelblitz?

Because you're so hot you literally break the laws of physics.
📅︎ Sep 16
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in France, they don't call kissing with tongue "French kissing", they call it "galocher"

which translates literally to "you and me tonight?"
👤︎ u/brybry-mack
📅︎ Feb 23
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he said "if you get what i mean" but i, in fact, do not get what he means

we'd been going back and forth with bad self decpreciating pick up lines on tinder for 2 or 3 days now, he said "i'd smash that mf 'turn off alarm' button if you catch my drift" but i do not catch his drift... is this a suicide joke (because like literally same)? is this a joke about turning off his alarm in the morning? i don't get it :-( does anyone know what he means, or at least have a good self deprecating pick up line i could use?
👤︎ u/sad_dadclub
📅︎ Mar 23
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