None Pick up lines

The best None pick up lines

Your Dad must be a baker

Because you've got some sweet buns. My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns.
📅︎ Feb 07
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Hey girl are you a Dino?

Connection terminated. I'm sorry to interrupt you, Elizabeth, if you still even remember that name, But I'm afraid you've been misinformed. You are not here to receive a gift, nor have you been called here by the individual you assume, although, you have indeed been called. You have all been called here, into a labyrinth of sounds and smells, misdirection and misfortune. A labyrinth with no exit, a maze with no prize. You don't even realize that you are trapped. Your lust for blood has driven you in endless circles, chasing the cries of children in some unseen chamber, always seeming so near, yet somehow out of reach, but you will never find them. None of you will. This is where your story ends. And to you, my brave volunteer, who somehow found this job listing not intended for you, although there was a way out planned for you, I have a feeling that's not what you want. I have a feeling that you are right where you want to be. I am remaining as well. I am nearby. This place will not be remembered, and the memory of everything that started this can finally begin to fade away. As the agony of every tragedy should. And to you monsters trapped in the corridors, be still and give up your spirits. They don't belong to you. For most of you, I believe there is peace and perhaps more waiting for you after the smoke clears. Although, for one of you, the darkest pit of Hell has opened to swallow you whole, so don't keep the devil waiting, old friend. My daughter, if you can hear me, I knew you would return as well. It's in your nature to protect the innocent. I'm sorry that on that day, the day you were shut out and left to die, no one was there to lift you up into their arms the way you lifted others into yours, and then, what became of you. I should have known you wouldn't be content to disappear, not my daughter. I couldn't save you then, so let me save you now. It's time to rest - for you, and for those you have carried in your arms. This ends for all of us. End communication.
📅︎ May 09
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I’m surrounded by all these people at home

But none of them are you
👤︎ u/Cowboy_V
📅︎ May 07
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(Late) Valentine’s Day themed pickup lines

1. If you had to choose one Valentine’s Day gift to receive, what would it be? 2. Let’s settle this debate: candy hearts, terrible or the absolute worst? 3. Russell Stover and come over? 4. 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹 ^ some flowers for you on this fine Valentine’s Day 5. Ideal Valentine’s Day dinner menu? 6. Right from the start you stole my heart. Lol, I took that from a Hallmark card…What’s up? 7. What’s your best Valentine’s Day pickup line? (Yes, this is mine.) 8. If I were to give you a Valentine, it’d be a picture of Simon Cowell that says, “It’s a yes from me” 9. *read in life alert lady voice* Help! I’ve fallen for you, and I can’t get up. 10. If you were a candy heart, what would you say? 11. I spent all night making you a Valentine. When are you free so I can give it to you? 12. Fuck, marry, kill: candy hearts, chocolate-covered strawberries, very expensive and subpar Valentine’s Day dinners 13. Hey, kinda awkward but I think my Valentine got lost in the mail? 14. You can only choose one cheesy and awful Valentine’s Day pickup line. Choose wisely: A. This Valentine’s Day, let’s make like fabric softener and Snuggle. B. Cupid called. He says that he needs my heart back. C. You’re so sweet, you could put Hershey’s out of business. D. None, but you’re funny and original. Let’s get a drink.
👤︎ u/KPA-15
📅︎ Feb 15
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Are you the Tesla cybertruck

Because you’ve got no curves, yet you’re beautiful none the less.
👤︎ u/jayforder
📅︎ Dec 05
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If I flip a coin, what are the odds you give me head

Girl: none Guy: Then do I get the tail?
👤︎ u/patrix299
📅︎ Feb 06
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How much dirt is in a 1” x 1” x 2” hole?

None, but it can have 1/5 of my dick in it if you want
👤︎ u/wgryphon12
📅︎ Apr 10
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If you were a farm animal

If you were a pig I'd be wrong in thinking porcupine. If you were a cow, I'd be right in thinking you're bovine. If you were a giraffe, I don't know what I'd think. Since you're none of these, I'll just say I like the way you look.
👤︎ u/Zax1989
📅︎ Mar 21
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