Pitch Pick up lines

i’m already pitching a tent

Probably right now you might be in a place you do not like, and you are using escapism actions to face that. For some it will be playing video games, watching porn, eating junk food…you better than anyone know what you are doing to escape certain feelings. The question is: What are you using as an escape to avoid feeling bad about yourself? To break that pattern is not easy there are no magic pills, it is a constant work in progress. First, start thinking more about your goals. Create clear reasons to do all of them. Pitch your perfect life, pitch the perfect version of yourself, the one where you are good enough, ready for everything. Then start asking yourself what's the difference between the person you are right now and the person you want to be. What are you lacking? What goals should you accomplish in order to be that person and start writing them down. Have measurable goals so you can check on your progress. Then ask yourself from the person I am today how can I get to that person I imagine? What skills do I need to get? At the same time start by getting to know yourself better. Bring your pains into your awareness. Why do I feel this in this moment? Go deeper. What is triggering me to feel in a certain state? Why do I feel this way? Ask yourself several times this question why, why and why? Identify the moments you react disproportionality to the situation like feeling anxious to approach and other stress states. Check what triggers you. Identify the sensation and the thought that is coming up and then ask what the other situations were where you had this kind of sensations. What was the previous time that you felt that? And before that time when did you feel that? Until you find when was the first time you felt the exact fear that you are feeling right now. Try to meditate everyday: Think about what are you escaping. Think about the sensation that you feel, when you feel bad. When was the previous time that you were feeling this too? Breath into the sensations that are provoking your escapism. Accept them and let them go. You need to do this every day and have no expectations of when this will work and make the feeling go away. There are only benefits from doing it. Then use the following breathing exercise when you are feeling this: 6 seconds breathe in, 3 seconds hold, 6 seconds exhale doing “shhh” sound and letting go of the feeling, 3 seconds hold and again. Hope this is helpful for you to apply during this quarantine times Peace out 😘

If you can help me when I pitch a tent maybe we could set up camp afterwards

Cuz ya sure did pitch my tent!

Girl, are you a heater because you really know how to warm my heart. I don't want you to watch the sunset, I want us to watch the sun set. Wanna go camping? I've already pitched the tent ;)

I drink. It’s enjoyable. I think that I am a pretty good drunk too. I don't get overly emotional; I don't get angered easy; the only stupid things I do when loaded hurt me and no one else; and I don't, typically, cause shit. But, every once in a while, I will be out on the town and that little glint will surely be showing in the corner of my eye. I am stretching to remember this story as it happened in a pub that has been since renamed twice. One particular, Friday/Saturday night it was myself, a few buddies and one of my brothers. It was the brother I lived with in the area at the time and we had a treasure trove of inside jokes at all times; I could tell that outsiders found it nearly detestable being around us because they would have no fucking clue what we were talking about. A particular hilarious inside joke we had at this time came out while watching sports, particularly hockey. Our mom's side of the family was a farming family and my mom was, generally, a modern woman with all that behind her; unless you threw her in an exciting situation, then the farmer side would shine forth. This was particularly illuminated whenever she would get excited about sports and she would let out a, what sounded like from a coyote, 'yip' noise. We grew up with that noise popping out above all else at numerous soccer and football games our whole lives. For some reason, either my brother or I did it while watching the Oilers play, and presumably lose, we thought that it was the singlehanded funniest thing in the whole world. All the best comedy is just pointing out the absurdity of commonplace things; our mom's yip was to be no different. So anyways, we are at the Thirsty Turtle one particular night. I have a great crew of guys and it was a pretty great place for talking to girls; really casual and everyone got fucked up there all the time. Through some fucking miracle, I find myself sharing a small table with a young lady and I am doing my best to show her that I am not a rapist; it really is the first thing you need to establish when you are hitting on a girl at a bar; you can’t just say “hey, I’m not a rapist”, you need to use subtlety in order to convince them of your legitimacy. But my brother would walk by and every time he did he would emit that same high-pitched "yip!" I, obviously, would need to respond with the same, it wouldn't be as infinitely funny to us if I didn't. After the first yip, the girl leaned in close to me and said "what the fuck was that? Did you just bark at me?" I laughed at the absurdity of the question and in the midst of my outburst she leaned in again to say "cause I don't fuckin play that." My first thoughts were: "This isn't the first time someone has barked at you?" and "if so, what the fuck are you all about to have this be a common occurrence?" I really did think it was hilarious how serious our conversation got, but wanted to get laid; so, I picked up the slack, changed the subject, and tried to get friendly again. Things were going pretty well until my brother made another lap around the bar. "Yip", he insisted as he walked by. "YIP!" I said with zeal to respond. Needless to say, my date was very unimpressed with my hooting. She leaned in to say something presumptuous, along the lines of: "are you fucking assholes calling me a dog?" I laughed at the craziness of the situation and she got mad and was nearly yelling "Don't fucking bark at me". That glint I was talking about then surged up as if from nowhere and implanted itself on my eye. I leaned right up to her as if to whisper an apology in her ear and said "yip". She didn't say a word as she lifted her leg up, placed her foot on my stool, and pushed off. As I fell backwards I reached for anything I could grab, but there were no handles available; I can still see the lateral rotation of the room and feel my chance to get laid falling to the floor with me. I fell backwards to a luckily unattended area and the only thing that hurt was my pride. The bouncer then came up to me and said "you gotta go". I responded like a little wiener with "but she pushed ME!" He said, "I know, I saw the whole thing, she is getting kicked out the back door". I love how they kicked me out the front and her out the back as if we were to fight. Is that an Edmonton assumption? I left with my tail between my legs and went home to the doghouse again.