Won't Pick up lines

Because then I have an excuse to Kidnap you

Because you are Cu-Tea ;)

and tell him what you want down your chimney.

I'll take you out

Without U ;)

Damn it, I guess you just won - Day 87

I'll lock you down :)

May I?

Because then you will get the D and I will get A

Stalin: Girl, you a communist? Girl: Yes, why? Stalin: Because I feel a uprising in my lower classes

But my love for you won't

Because you make me happy and if I don't have you 7 times per day I won't feel right.

Cause a cross won't be enough protection.

Because a lot of guys may have been inside you, but once you're mine, there won't be any others.

I won't kill you. Stolen from facebook.

but being my girl surely won't ;)

But you can expect 7-8 inches in your forecast tonight, you won't be able to leave the house for a few days

Cause I'll do you for hours and still won't get bored - Day 111

Cus you won't keep me up in the day , but let me stay up all night long

And her nickname is Dottie. DAAMN girl are you a ballot? Because I'm about to slam you on a desk and I won't stop till all of your dots are filled.

Because I'd love showing off to the entire world that you're with me. We can go anywhere you want to go. I'll buy dinner and pay for our movie tickets too. Genuinely no expectation for sex because just knowing you want to spend time with me would get me off. We can get ice creams and lick each other's flavors. Like in super slow motion. If you choke on something I'm going to do everything in my power to keep you alive because when we do have sexual intercourse it will only be with your not dead body. Every time I see you my heart does multiple somersaults inside and I wish you could somehow feel that feeling it gives me so you'd have some idea of how fully head over heels I am for you and that luscious body you're packing into that outfit of yours. When we do make sweet love to each other's bodies you will always finish first. In fact if you don't bust a lady nut I won't be busting a jizz nut either. If you send me nudes not only will I never share them with anybody else ever I will also make sure and keep them inside encrypted folders on external drives that I keep in my 6 foot fire proof safe. Any time I use them to pleasure my weiner dong I'll make sure to put the nudes back into the safe immediately. Before I even clean up the mess you made me make because I was thinking about you and you got me so horny I couldn't even properly prepare ahead of time and get the paper towels ready so I just launched the baby batter right into my belly button. And when our date is over I'm going to be waiting by my phone anxiously awaiting your next texts to find out when I can set eyes on you again. What really confuses me is how I survived all my life without you because now that I know you girl, I can't live another moment without you in my life. Ok so, pick you up around 5?

But don't worry, I'll catch you and won't let you down

Cause you won't shut the fuck up

I had a bad day, it won't be anymore if I got to cuddle you - Day 53

Because I just edited this post so you won't be able to see this post

Cuz i won't LED anyone else take you.

Cause once you start coming, you won't be able to stop

....because after you're with me, you won't be able to walk.

**Other person:** "Why?" **You:** "That's my wifi password, this way you won't have to ask for it when you come over to my house."

Cause there's 10 reasons why you're great and you won't believe number 5! EDIT: Incorrect grammar.

I won't forget a pickup line after I use it.

I keep seeing people asking for a "pickup line for someone named ____". Don't. Stop. You wanna know a good pickup line? "Hey, do you wanna go to lunch/go to dinner/get some coffee/see a game of roller derby with me?" So much better. Don't actually try to use the pickup lines on this sub. They won't work.

"I'll fuck you so hard your roommates won't forget my name"

Buy this toilet paper and it won't be the only thing wiping your ass tonight