Won't Pick up lines

The best Won't pick up lines

I hope your Dad won't approve us being together

Because then I have an excuse to Kidnap you
📅︎ Aug 15
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You won't like a coffee date with me

Because you are Cu-Tea ;)
📅︎ Dec 06
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Ho Ho Ho! Won't you come sit on Santa's lap,

and tell him what you want down your chimney.
👤︎ u/Ijackoffonu
📅︎ Dec 25
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If the corona won't take you out

I'll take you out
📅︎ Mar 24
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Hug and cuddle won't be the same

Without U ;)
📅︎ May 04
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I bet your cute face won't be enough to make someone fall for you...

Damn it, I guess you just won - Day 87
👤︎ u/suyashve
📅︎ Apr 02
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If the government won't lock you down,

I'll lock you down :)
📅︎ Mar 24
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If the Covid-19 virus won't take you out

May I?
👤︎ u/EkkoIsEz
📅︎ Mar 28
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I'm sure your parents won't let me date you...

Because then you will get the D and I will get A
👤︎ u/Tnr2D
📅︎ Nov 15
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Cykas won't get this.

Stalin: Girl, you a communist? Girl: Yes, why? Stalin: Because I feel a uprising in my lower classes
👤︎ u/MemerTron14
📅︎ Dec 06
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The year might end soon

But my love for you won't
👤︎ u/maniac_0
📅︎ Dec 28
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Hey girl are you a cup of tea?

Because you make me happy and if I don't have you 7 times per day I won't feel right.
👤︎ u/LNER4498
📅︎ Dec 10
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Hey girl are you Christian?

Cause a cross won't be enough protection.
📅︎ Nov 07
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Baby girl, are you the used car I crashed immediately after purchasing?

Because a lot of guys may have been inside you, but once you're mine, there won't be any others.
📅︎ Sep 30
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Even if I'm the imposter,

I won't kill you. Stolen from facebook.
👤︎ u/isira_w
📅︎ Sep 26
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Yeah, i get it, being a girl really sucks

but being my girl surely won't ;)
📅︎ Sep 13
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I'm not a weatherman...

But you can expect 7-8 inches in your forecast tonight, you won't be able to leave the house for a few days
👤︎ u/suyashve
📅︎ Sep 05
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Are you a good video game?

Cause I'll do you for hours and still won't get bored - Day 111
👤︎ u/suyashve
📅︎ Apr 26
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Daim Girl , are you an Energy Drink?

Cus you won't keep me up in the day , but let me stay up all night long
👤︎ u/JaysoTukan
📅︎ Sep 14
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When she says voting is sexy...

And her nickname is Dottie. DAAMN girl are you a ballot? Because I'm about to slam you on a desk and I won't stop till all of your dots are filled.
👤︎ u/H0L3PUNCH
📅︎ May 30
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Hey girl, you wanna go out in public with me some time?

Because I'd love showing off to the entire world that you're with me. We can go anywhere you want to go. I'll buy dinner and pay for our movie tickets too. Genuinely no expectation for sex because just knowing you want to spend time with me would get me off. We can get ice creams and lick each other's flavors. Like in super slow motion. If you choke on something I'm going to do everything in my power to keep you alive because when we do have sexual intercourse it will only be with your not dead body. Every time I see you my heart does multiple somersaults inside and I wish you could somehow feel that feeling it gives me so you'd have some idea of how fully head over heels I am for you and that luscious body you're packing into that outfit of yours. When we do make sweet love to each other's bodies you will always finish first. In fact if you don't bust a lady nut I won't be busting a jizz nut either. If you send me nudes not only will I never share them with anybody else ever I will also make sure and keep them inside encrypted folders on external drives that I keep in my 6 foot fire proof safe. Any time I use them to pleasure my weiner dong I'll make sure to put the nudes back into the safe immediately. Before I even clean up the mess you made me make because I was thinking about you and you got me so horny I couldn't even properly prepare ahead of time and get the paper towels ready so I just launched the baby batter right into my belly button. And when our date is over I'm going to be waiting by my phone anxiously awaiting your next texts to find out when I can set eyes on you again. What really confuses me is how I survived all my life without you because now that I know you girl, I can't live another moment without you in my life. Ok so, pick you up around 5?
👤︎ u/muckrak3r
📅︎ Feb 20
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They say it could take as little as five seconds to fall for someone...

But don't worry, I'll catch you and won't let you down
📅︎ Apr 12
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Hey girl. Are you a smoke detector?

Cause you won't shut the fuck up
📅︎ Jan 25
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Roses are red, my heart's feeling blue...

I had a bad day, it won't be anymore if I got to cuddle you - Day 53
👤︎ u/suyashve
📅︎ Feb 27
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Hey girl, did I just pull a pro-gamer move?

Because I just edited this post so you won't be able to see this post
📅︎ Oct 24
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Hey girl, are you the last electric lightsource?

Cuz i won't LED anyone else take you.
📅︎ Jul 24
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Hey girl, are you diarrhea?

Cause once you start coming, you won't be able to stop
📅︎ May 25
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Girl, you can call me polio

....because after you're with me, you won't be able to walk.
📅︎ Feb 20
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Hh7ykK34Am, save that

**Other person:** "Why?" **You:** "That's my wifi password, this way you won't have to ask for it when you come over to my house."
📅︎ Apr 25
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Hey Girl are you ClickBait?

Cause there's 10 reasons why you're great and you won't believe number 5! EDIT: Incorrect grammar.
👤︎ u/Samisoni1
📅︎ Feb 24
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Do you know what the difference between you and a pickup line is?

I won't forget a pickup line after I use it.
📅︎ Mar 30
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Rant: on actuall using these lines

I keep seeing people asking for a "pickup line for someone named ____". Don't. Stop. You wanna know a good pickup line? "Hey, do you wanna go to lunch/go to dinner/get some coffee/see a game of roller derby with me?" So much better. Don't actually try to use the pickup lines on this sub. They won't work.
👤︎ u/lordberric
📅︎ Aug 14
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I was proud of this one

"I'll fuck you so hard your roommates won't forget my name"
📅︎ Sep 23
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Make sure you have toilet paper.

Buy this toilet paper and it won't be the only thing wiping your ass tonight
📅︎ Sep 27
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