Wouldn Pick up lines

The best Wouldn pick up lines

Eating you wouldn't be considered cannibalism.

Its called having a sweet tooth.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Spanish-Philosopher
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 22
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Eating you wouldn't be considered as cannibalism

It's called having a sweet tooth
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Lio_katanani
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 21
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What's the difference between you and a a Toaster?

I wouldn't put my dick in a toaster
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Belugaboy_
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 16
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Even if I fell, you wouldn't help.

Because if you did, I'll fall for you again.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/holyanis2
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 05
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I wouldnโ€™t change a thing about you.

I mean besides that last name.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/GoldenEcho404
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 10
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Hey girl i have never been in a car crash before

But I wouldnโ€™t mind hitting at your rear end
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/crackit_boi
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 18
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It must be really confusing to play chess with you..

Heck I wouldn't know if the onboard queen is cuter or the one moving it.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/LightSaberBatman
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 27
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Hey girl, I have never been in a car crash before

But I wouldnโ€™t mind hitting your rear end
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/KingKush24
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 06
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I wouldn't mind being a thief

To steal a kiss from you
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Inhypx
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 26
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If god didnโ€™t want us to f*ck

He wouldnโ€™t have made you so Holy.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Besval10
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 16
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I wouldn't mind if you took one of my hoodies home

It's a fair trade for me trying to steal your heart. BTW I don't know if this has been posted before and if it has sorry x Probably has as it seems pretty beta
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/lVlxchael
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 02
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I have never been a mechanic...

But I wouldn't mind changing your fluids
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/suyashve
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 30
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i'm not suicidal, but if you're the cliff,

i know i wouldn't hesitate to leap into the abyss.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/elixirxvi
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 15
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If we had a staring contest..

I would win cause I wouldn't be able to take my eyes off you ๐Ÿฅฐ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/that1kidinthecornerr
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 15
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I wouldnโ€™t be as good as Thanos

Because I wouldnโ€™t even think of dropping you off of a cliff
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Shush122
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 03
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Hey girl are you the coronavirus?

Because if I had you, I wouldn't leave the house for 2 weeks either
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/GoldenGoat1997
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 08
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Are you the government

Cause I wouldnโ€™t mind getting f***ed by you
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Cattycatgirl
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 06
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If your number was a virus

I wouldn't mind getting it
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Alfielizard
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 14
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Iโ€™m lactose intolerant,

but I wouldnโ€™t mind your cream ๐Ÿ˜ณ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/that1kidinthecornerr
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 27
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I donโ€™t wanna be a narcissist, but I must be a 9/10

because youโ€™re the one (1) I need :) Edit: personally never heard this one but if it seems like a repost (I wouldnโ€™t be surprised cause it sounds like something that would be common) sorry in advance Edit 2, a better version based on a comment: Girl, ur a 9/10 bc Iโ€™m the 1 u need :)
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/AlterideIX
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 05
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Hey girl are you a Dino?

Connection terminated. I'm sorry to interrupt you, Elizabeth, if you still even remember that name, But I'm afraid you've been misinformed. You are not here to receive a gift, nor have you been called here by the individual you assume, although, you have indeed been called. You have all been called here, into a labyrinth of sounds and smells, misdirection and misfortune. A labyrinth with no exit, a maze with no prize. You don't even realize that you are trapped. Your lust for blood has driven you in endless circles, chasing the cries of children in some unseen chamber, always seeming so near, yet somehow out of reach, but you will never find them. None of you will. This is where your story ends. And to you, my brave volunteer, who somehow found this job listing not intended for you, although there was a way out planned for you, I have a feeling that's not what you want. I have a feeling that you are right where you want to be. I am remaining as well. I am nearby. This place will not be remembered, and the memory of everything that started this can finally begin to fade away. As the agony of every tragedy should. And to you monsters trapped in the corridors, be still and give up your spirits. They don't belong to you. For most of you, I believe there is peace and perhaps more waiting for you after the smoke clears. Although, for one of you, the darkest pit of Hell has opened to swallow you whole, so don't keep the devil waiting, old friend. My daughter, if you can hear me, I knew you would return as well. It's in your nature to protect the innocent. I'm sorry that on that day, the day you were shut out and left to die, no one was there to lift you up into their arms the way you lifted others into yours, and then, what became of you. I should have known you wouldn't be content to disappear, not my daughter. I couldn't save you then, so let me save you now. It's time to rest - for you, and for those you have carried in your arms. This ends for all of us. End communication.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/petergriffinfricken
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 09
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Hey boy are you a boomer meme?

Because I wouldnโ€™t share you with anyone :)
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/XSlayerZX
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 20
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Are you the white mountains?

Cause I wanna explore every inch of you (we were both into backpacking and outdoorsy stuff). Also I just need to vent idc if anyone reads this. She was so incredibly romantic, idk how I'll ever find anyone like her (but without her flaws cause I wouldn't date anyone with them ever again) and ik that's such an only-dated-one-person thing to say but ya thats the tea
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Not_instant_ramen17
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 21
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Hey, are you a plane?

Cuz I wouldnโ€™t get on you right now, but I look forward to climbing aboard in the future ;)
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/panem123
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 15
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What's the difference between you and work?

I wouldn't enjoy coming into work tomorrow.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Penmer
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 20
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If you were a YouTube ad

I wouldnโ€™t skip
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/thunderdog1
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 25
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If you were my waitress

I wouldnโ€™t just give you a tip. Iโ€™d give you the whole thing.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/jmahler0514
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 26
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What's the difference between you and a snow bank?

I wouldn't enjoy plowing the snow bank.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/SpookyRecoil
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 29
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I hate reciting vows but...

if the vows were with you, I wouldnโ€™t mine ;)
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Dhanwil
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 25
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Hey girl, are you a warehouse?

Cuz I wouldnโ€™t mind if you held my junk
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/LikeBrockWork
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 03
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Even if I looked through every dictionary in the world..

There still wouldnโ€™t be enough words to describe how beautiful you are.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ArtiiiNia
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 08
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Are you an extermination camp?

Because I wouldnโ€™t mind entering your gas chamber
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/PrinceDunce
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 23
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Hey girl, are you the Higgs boson?

Because without you my universe wouldn't "matter"
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/sam200329
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 21
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Whatโ€™s Seven long and you need from me ?

My phone number. I wouldโ€™ve given you my area code but I knew you wouldnโ€™t believe whatโ€™s 10 long and you need from me.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/YungTesla59
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 11
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If you were a mineral Iโ€™d be a geologist

Because I wouldnโ€™t take you for granite
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Knight499
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 29
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Are you The Elephant's Foot?

Because I wouldn't last 5 minutes with you.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/jUkkLeb
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 08
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I bet a lot of guys say you're a 10, but I say you're a 9, nobody's a 10....

I wouldn't even say I'm a 10, a hard 9 but definitely not a 10
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/McGroon
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 11
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Hey baby are you hard liquor!

Because I wouldn't present you in front of my mom
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Pool7597
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 03
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Pickup lines for the name Rain

Let your amazing brain generate the best it could, guys. My IRL name is Rain. I'm not from an english speaking country, but people still get the jokes. --- Some, which I've collected/thought/heard throughout the years: The weather forecast told me today, that Rain is "coming" today (and you will get wet) A fun fact, did you know, that Rain has made almost every woman in the world wet? Use a protection while Rain is coming... Like an umbrella. Do you know Pitbull? Cuz I'd like to Rain over you. Hey, I'm globally famous, ask anyone if they know Rain. If you'll be with me, you wouldn't have to listen to 10 hour Rain sounds on YouTube to be relaxed. If you want to know how deep I can go, just google "Rain qoutes."
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Rainkk
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 21
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Post your nerdy pickup lines here

I'll start: you're like the Higgs Boson, without, the Universe wouldn't matter
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Zxorac
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 18
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Girl you are so beautiful

that Honest Abe wouldn't be Honest anymore because he couldn't honestly describe your beauty.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Ferris4lyfe
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 24
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If I had a nickel for every time you made me smile

I wouldn't be Nicholas...
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/pinnouse
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 17
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My favorite funny pick up lines

The first pick up line is well known but yeah. I wouldn't use funny pick up lines when first meeting someone but only when you're already close and just wanna flirt. 1. Hey girl are your parents retarded? Cuz damn girl you're special. (Kind of a touchy one depending on the person) 2. Hey do you like to eat magnets? No why? Cuz I'm pretty attracted to you. 3. Do you have any peanuts in your purse? No. How about a date? 4. Hey girl are you my appendix because I don't know how you work but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out. Lol
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Pristinejake
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 21
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That Time I got Kicked out of the Thirsty Turtle for Barking at a Girl.

I drink. Itโ€™s enjoyable. I think that I am a pretty good drunk too. I don't get overly emotional; I don't get angered easy; the only stupid things I do when loaded hurt me and no one else; and I don't, typically, cause shit. But, every once in a while, I will be out on the town and that little glint will surely be showing in the corner of my eye. I am stretching to remember this story as it happened in a pub that has been since renamed twice. One particular, Friday/Saturday night it was myself, a few buddies and one of my brothers. It was the brother I lived with in the area at the time and we had a treasure trove of inside jokes at all times; I could tell that outsiders found it nearly detestable being around us because they would have no fucking clue what we were talking about. A particular hilarious inside joke we had at this time came out while watching sports, particularly hockey. Our mom's side of the family was a farming family and my mom was, generally, a modern woman with all that behind her; unless you threw her in an exciting situation, then the farmer side would shine forth. This was particularly illuminated whenever she would get excited about sports and she would let out a, what sounded like from a coyote, 'yip' noise. We grew up with that noise popping out above all else at numerous soccer and football games our whole lives. For some reason, either my brother or I did it while watching the Oilers play, and presumably lose, we thought that it was the singlehanded funniest thing in the whole world. All the best comedy is just pointing out the absurdity of commonplace things; our mom's yip was to be no different. So anyways, we are at the Thirsty Turtle one particular night. I have a great crew of guys and it was a pretty great place for talking to girls; really casual and everyone got fucked up there all the time. Through some fucking miracle, I find myself sharing a small table with a young lady and I am doing my best to show her that I am not a rapist; it really is the first thing you need to establish when you are hitting on a girl at a bar; you canโ€™t just say โ€œhey, Iโ€™m not a rapistโ€, you need to use subtlety in order to convince them of your legitimacy. But my brother would walk by and every time he did he would emit that same high-pitched "yip!" I, obviously, would need to respond with the same, it wouldn't be as infinitely funny to us if I didn't. After the first yip, the girl leaned in close to me and said "what the fuck was that? Did you just bark at me?" I laughed at the absurdity of the question and in the midst of my outburst she leaned in again to say "cause I don't fuckin play that." My first thoughts were: "This isn't the first time someone has barked at you?" and "if so, what the fuck are you all about to have this be a common occurrence?" I really did think it was hilarious how serious our conversation got, but wanted to get laid; so, I picked up the slack, changed the subject, and tried to get friendly again. Things were going pretty well until my brother made another lap around the bar. "Yip", he insisted as he walked by. "YIP!" I said with zeal to respond. Needless to say, my date was very unimpressed with my hooting. She leaned in to say something presumptuous, along the lines of: "are you fucking assholes calling me a dog?" I laughed at the craziness of the situation and she got mad and was nearly yelling "Don't fucking bark at me". That glint I was talking about then surged up as if from nowhere and implanted itself on my eye. I leaned right up to her as if to whisper an apology in her ear and said "yip". She didn't say a word as she lifted her leg up, placed her foot on my stool, and pushed off. As I fell backwards I reached for anything I could grab, but there were no handles available; I can still see the lateral rotation of the room and feel my chance to get laid falling to the floor with me. I fell backwards to a luckily unattended area and the only thing that hurt was my pride. The bouncer then came up to me and said "you gotta go". I responded like a little wiener with "but she pushed ME!" He said, "I know, I saw the whole thing, she is getting kicked out the back door". I love how they kicked me out the front and her out the back as if we were to fight. Is that an Edmonton assumption? I left with my tail between my legs and went home to the doghouse again.
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Osborne26
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 29
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